Wednesday, October 17, 2007

10 Things I Discovered past Fifty

10. I was asleep one morning and woke up abruptly to the sound of snoring. I discovered that I was the only one in the house.
9. Examining my legs one day I noticed several hairs not shaved, I discovered I couldn't see that far anymore.
8. Examining my armpits closely with a magnifying mirror, I discovered missed hairs, yes, I can't see that close anymore also.
7. I bought a nosehair trimmer upon noticing those fellows too.
6. I discovered two hairs growing quite prolificly upon my chin which I have to constantly keep a tweezer on.
5. I discovered it is not always as easy to fall asleep and stay asleep when you want to.
4. Jars and jars of wrinkle remover and age refining cream don't actually work, they're just expensive.
3. Sneezing, laughing too hard, and jumping on trampolines can cause accidents!
2. Some days it seems that my stomach sticks out in the front as far as my butt does in the back!
1. The Number 1 thing I discovered is if you put a hair clippy on your cat's tail, you could end up with a fat lip if it flies off!

P.S. I almost forgot, (which makes this even funnier) walking back to another room to remember what you forgot is at least good exercise!!

4 comments:

Tiggerlane said...

I am in BIG trouble, b/c I just turned 39, and I've already experienced #10, #8, #6, #5 and #3. Lord, help me!

theotherbear said...

I was just about to type the same comment as tiggerlane! I can lay claim to several of those, including the un-numbered item at the end - I am always 'retracing my steps to remember what I forgot'.

Junebug said...

Some of these things happened earlier to me too.

janet said...

omigod, i'm laughing so hard. you have summed up my life in 10 items (plus one). thanks for the giggle. (yes, that's me, laughing through my tears!)